


the healing process of a scarred heart

by fanfictionist



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Anorexia, Bullying, F/F, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2017-08-09
Packaged: 2018-12-13 11:05:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11758521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanfictionist/pseuds/fanfictionist
Summary: pearl simply went through life hiding away from everything and everyone never trusting anyone, until Garnet a sporty and mysterious girl came into her life showing her that life was worth living, and that there are people that can be trusted.





	the healing process of a scarred heart

Pearl sat on her floor her sketches and canvases littered around her she sighed tiredly the dorm next door was pounding with music a party clearly being thrown, pearl tried to ignore the constant disturbance that was interrupting her art project but it was becoming more difficult as more people were being brought in. finally pearl laid down her pencil and stood up stretching as she did so, she laid down on her bed deciding to clean up her sheets in the morning. She quickly checked her phone to see if she had any messages on her phone to find three text messages the first being from her ex rose "hey hope you're alright me and Greg have been fine we will both see you soon" Pearl smiled sadly at the text and saved it with the other texts the next text was fro her parents telling her to keep concentrating on her studies and to be more like her sisters blue and aurora and stop putting so much effort in her art. Pearl sighed tiredly not at all surprised about her parents criticizing behavior the last text made Pearls blood run cold it was an unknown number and when she opened the text it said "hey tramp it's you know who I have found your number and I am here to remind you that you are an ugly fat bitch that needs to know where her place is in this college and that’s at the very bottom" Pearl closed down her phone and walked to the large mirror that was attached to the wall slowly she began to undress herself till she was just in her underwear, she chocked back a sob as she stared at her body in her eyes she was enormous even when her ribs were on show and her hip bones jutted out. Pearl reached up behind the mirror feeling around till she found what she was looking for, a small blade like the ones that are found in cheep razors brought in almost any off license shop taped to the back of the mirror, pearl looked down to her stomach where rows of scars and cuts were she sighed tracing over the scars 'still no room' pearl thought as she moved to her arms where from her upper arms to her wrists were also covered no room to be seen finally pearl moved to her legs where there was finally a place for her to do her art.  
Pearl bandaged the last of her legs signing in relief and began to get dressed in her pajamas the party next to her had finally begun to calm down and now was down to a few muffled voices and laughter. Just as suddenly there was a knock that made pearl jump she looked at the door nervously the last time someone had knocked at her door and she answered it she was attacked by bags of flours, eggs and milk and pictures were posted and printed being hung in every wall in the dorms. Pearl quietly made her way to the door and looked through the key hole a tall lady with an athro stood in sight pearl hesitantly opened the door "c-can I help y-you" she whispered the tall lady nodded "erm could I use your phone I need to make a few phone calls and the phones next door have been either broken, stolen or dead" pearl nodded her head after some thinking see it harmless enough to allow "sorry about the mess" pearl said embarrassingly quickly picking up the sketches that were left on the floor the lady remained quiet simply steeping over the paper and making her way to the home phone, Pearl sat on her bed ignoring the chatting the lady was doing finally she got off the phone and made her way to Pearl “thank you again for letting me use your phone” pearl smiled shyly nodding her head “I’m happy to be some use” Pearl said standing up from her bed the lady smiled reaching out a hand in which pearl quickly flinched away from, the women frowned at Pearl’s reaction but quickly spoke up to prevent any awkward silence “my name is Garnet I’m your next door dorm neighbor” pearl hesitantly shook Garnet’s hand “my name is Pearl” Garnet nodded her head she then pointed down to the sketches that were now Strawn messily on Pearl’s desk “you have quite a talent with a pencil Pearl” pearl blushed not used to this type of attention “th-thank you” Garnet nodded smiling she made her way to the door and Pearl stumbled quickly to let her out. Once Garnet was in the hall she turned to face pearl and said “hey I sometimes notice you around the grounds and you seem to always be alone if you want you could hang out with me and my friends” pearl didn’t know what to say so she just nodded her head. Satisfied garnet turned and walked into the door next door giving a final wave goodbye to Pearl. Once she disappeared through her door Pearl closed her own and for the first time in years she felt a smile appear across her face, she had never met someone so nice before and she was invited to join her with her friends her smile quickly fell away at the thought of Garnet’s friends. “What if they don’t like me? I have to make a good impression of myself” pearl said to herself practically running to her wardrobe and looking through to find something to wear the next day she finally settled for a white sweater with a yellow star on it and a pair of leggings, finally once she was satisfied she laid down in bed and stared at her ceiling trying to fight her insomnia and get some sleep finally her eyes begun to slide shut and she was able to slip into slumber.  
Pearl woke up to her alarm blaring in her ear she groaned crawling out of bed she quickly went through her daily routine of getting ready for her day of lessons she got dressed brushed her teeth weighed herself and re-bandaged her cuts and made sure she had everything in her bag that she needed. Pearl checked her phone once again and saw that she had one message from you-know-who saying the usual compliments of Pearl being a fat no good son of a bitch. Pearl sighed deleting the message. She swung her bag onto her shoulder and opened the door. All of a sudden she felt her whole body be consumed by sticky liquid and once she wiped the substance away from her eyes to find it was red paint pearl felt tears begin to form in her eyes she quickly turned to enter her dorm when she noticed a note stuck to the wall beside her door she pulled it off and begun reading “hey tramp thought to help you with your look so we figured that maybe paint would help cover your ugly disgrace of a face no need to thank us good luck washing it out” a hand on Pearl’s shoulder interrupted her thoughts “Pearl what happened!” pearl sighed in relief recognizing it as Garnet’s voice she turned to face Garnet she stared at the ground ashamed to be found like this. She heard Garnet sigh and grab her arm gently still making Pearl wince slightly “come on lets get you cleaned up” garnet said softly leading her into her dorm, “you don’t have to help” pearl muttered as more tears began to fall down her cheeks. Pearl placed everything on her desk and got a new set of clothes and stepped into the bathroom to wash off the paint. Once she had finished and had left the bathroom she found Garnet sitting on the couch reading something “you didn’t have to wait you’re probably late for class” Garnet stood up from her seat holding up what she was reading Pearl’s blood ran cold when she saw it was the note that was left for her on the wall “who sent this to you” Garnet said her voice which was usually calm and collected was now seething with anger, Pearl shrugged her shoulders “it doesn’t matter” pearl said quickly grabbing her stuff and made her way to the door “I’m sorry for being a bother” pearl said before leaving without another word and before Garnet could stop her.  
Pearl spent the rest of the day taking notes in class and doodling between that, at lunch she sat down in her usual bench. She jumped at the sudden sound of people approaching she looked up to see Garnet and a group of people walking towards her “hey Pearl is it alright if me and my friends sit with you” Pearl too surprised nodded dumbly closing her sketchbook as she watched the group begin to sit down and make themselves comfortable “so you’re Pearl the one Garnet has bragged on and on about being her dorm neighbor” a chubby girl with purple hair said chomping on her sandwich loudly the girl next to her stared at Pearl for a second before bursting out laughing “I knew I recognized you from somewhere you’re dairy girl” she said through fits of laughter as she begun searching her phone until she found what she was looking for and showed everyone on the table. Pearl felt her face heat up from embarrassment and dread as she recognized it to be the picture taken when her bullies with eggs and milk attacked her. She fought back the tears as she stood up quickly “I have to go” Pearl said and ran away ignoring the cries from the group, and made her way to the nearest bathroom little knowing that a certain sketchbook was left on the bench. “Wow what was that all about” Amethyst said watching as Pearl ran away, Garnet said nothing simply picking up the sketch book that Pearl left curiosity got the best of her and she opened the book and began to skim through the pages and she began to get engrossed in the many sketches that seemed to come to life on the page then she saw the last sketch and recognized it from the shades and the athro that it was the beginning of herself being drawn. Garnet got up from her seat grabbing the attention of the others “hey G where you going”? Amethyst questioned looking up what her and Peridot were laughing about on Peridot’s phone “Pearl left her book here I’m just going to return it” amethyst shrugged but then quickly showed Garnet what both her and Peridot were laughing about “hey check this out someone pranked Pearl with some red paint and they were able to get a picture of it is hilarious” Garnet felt anger bubble up inside her as she looked at the picture of Pearl close to tears and covered in red paint “that was not pranking it was bullying” garnet said through ground teeth as she slammed down the note that she was going to talk to Pearl about before she left so suddenly that she found when Pearl was getting herself cleaned. As the group took it in turns to read the note amethyst began to talk “wow that’s some harsh shit who do these people think they are” Peridot nodded her head in agreement “if I had known I wouldn’t have even dreamed about mentioning the dairy girl picture” garnet picked the note back up and after saying goodbye to the group left to find Pearl.  
Pearl stepped out of the bathroom and washed her face with water to wipe any sign of her tears and any stray drops of blood that she may have missed. She checked her phone to find another text from the bully “hey tramp I want you to meet me outside the art department if you don’t come you will regret it” Pearl shivered and not from the cold, Pearl paused when she was about to delete the text but after a moment thinking saved it. Pearl was sitting on the floor reading her book when she heard a knock on her door. She got up and after looking through the peak hole and seeing that it was garnet opened the door to let her in “hey Pearl are you aright you didn’t look alright when you left” pearl shrugged closing the door once Garnet was in, Yeah of course you don’t have to worry about me” Pearl muttered as she sat down Garnet chuckled sadly “yeah but for some reason I can’t help it” she walked closer to pearl and held out something that made Pearl cry out in relief “thank you I’ve been looking for that everywhere” garnet smiled in satisfaction at Pearl’s reaction “I’m sorry but I couldn’t help but look inside and they are very good” Garnet complimented pearl blushed not used to being treated so nicely “thank you I um forgot to ask you if it is OK to draw you” pearl said quickly before her new found courage died away. Garnet seemed unfazed by the sudden question and nodded her head “I’m actually quite flattered that you thought me drawn worthy” pearl couldn’t believe what she was hearing “of course you are perfect your body figure contrasts brilliantly and your facial features look like they were carved in by an artist” pearl stopped suddenly when she realized what she said Garnet thought that now was the best time to talk about the note “so um could you please tell me why someone gave you a note like this” Garnet asked showing Pearl the note Pearl paled and suddenly became very interested with the floor “I thought you would have thrown it away and forgotten about it” Pearl muttered garnet simply shook her head “I don’t easily forget about stuff like this” Garnet said calmly “have you told someone about this they could help stop this from happening again” garnet said hoping that Pearl would listen, pearl muttered something along the lines of “why should I punish them for telling the truth” garnet sighed again giving up realizing that pearl was really stubborn. “fine anyway my friends want to apologies for bringing it up” garnet said stiffly still not liking the idea of the bullies not being punished for their actions she quickly waved goodbye and walked out of the dorm going to her own and leaving pearl alone. Pearl looked at her phone and cursed she was late and she needed to go.  
Pearl ran to the art department instantly finding her bullies she quietly walked towards them “you took your time we were beginning to worry” one of them sneered looking at pearl with disgust. Pearl looked at the floor “what do you want” pearl whispered. Yellow said nothing simply snapped her fingers and all of a sudden pearl was ambushed her bag taken away and emptied all over the floor, pearl was grabbed by the shoulders and kept still and forced to watch as they began burning her papers and books “now I want you to turn around and stay still if you don’t that neighbor of yours will pay and if you scream we’ll rip out your voice box” white said cheerfully and pearl only saw a glimpse of something metal before she was forcefully turned round and her shirt torn up exposing her back pearl felt a rag being shoved into her mouth “you know be grateful that we had one of our best metal carvers make this just for you, you should be grateful” pearl heard yellow say and then all pearl felt was a blinding white pain spread across her back and the smell of burning flesh met pearl’s nostrils causing her to feel nauseous. “There you go a gift from us to you” yellow said as pearl was thrown to the ground pearl just barely noticed yellow and the others leaving and pearl remained on the floor and stayed there till she was sure that they were long gone only then did she stand up trying her best to ignore the pain pearl searched the charred pile to see if anything survived pearl sobbed out a sigh of relief when she saw a single page survived with its edges the only damaged part pearl placed it in her bag and quickly went back to her dorms to try and clean and bandage the damage that was done on her back.  
Pearl collapsed once her door was shut and locked she walked into the bathroom and tried her best to see the damage and there burnt on her back was the words ‘fat, ugly and alone’ written in neat twirling writing, pearl sighed and cleaned it up and bandaged it gently “I need to go out and buy some more bandages” pearl muttered to herself pearl practically crawled to her bed and reached into her bag to fish out the surviving page to see that it was the unfinished sketch of garnet it was the final piece needed to cause all pearls emotions to collapse and pearl felt the tears run once again and she cried loudly sobbing into her knees, just so suddenly there was a knock on pearls door pearl ignored it hoping whoever it was would go away “hey pearl are you alright in there I can hear you crying” a voice that pearl recognized as garnets called from the other side of the door pearl continued to sob and ignore the door “look pearl if you don’t open up I’m gonna have to break the door down and neither of us want that now open the door” pearl reluctantly walked to the door unlocking it and opening it a crack wide enough for her to peek through “I'm alright” pearl whispered about to close the door once again when a hand shot through keeping the door opening “don’t lie to me you are not alright I can hear you crying” pearl stepped back as garnet walked in closing the door behind her “just tell me whats wrong I want to help” pearl hung her head in shame “I want to tell you but I cant otherwise you will be a target too and I don’t want you to suffer” garnet wrapped pearl in a hug but in which pearl yelped out in pain, “please pearl tell me whats wrong I don’t care if anyone gives me trouble I can defend myself but its hurting me seeing you like this all the time” pearl looked up to garnet and was surprised to see a pair of mismatched eyes meeting hers and it took a second to realize that garnet had taken her shades off and pearl saw within these eyes concern and something else she didn’t recognize, "look I'm not going anywhere until you tell me whats going on I've only met you yesterday and i can already tell that you've had a hard life and i want to make it easier" pearl nodded her head dumbly lost of words, finally when she found her voice she made her mind up, "I suffer from depression" pearl said looking up at Garnet for any sort of reaction, unfortunately Garnet had put her sunglasses back on and it was near impossible to tell what she was thinking "i have since my parents died in a car crash when i was thirteen that is how i got this" pearl said sweeping her fringe out the way to show a scar set in the middle of Pearl's forehead "i stayed in a orphanage till i was fifteen then i ran away where i got myself a job and began living by myself in a small flat, i then got a art degree in art and got a place in college, however due to my shy behavior and old clothes i began to be a target for bullies especially for a group that call themselves the diamond authority" Pearl heard garnet breath in a sharp breath indicating that Garnet knew who they were "and i grew more depressed, my trust in people begun to disappear" Pearl finished off her speech prepared for Garnet never wanting to have anything to do with her anymore and never talking to her again. but suddenly she was embraced into a hug and the feeling felt so foreign that Pearl didn't know what to do Garnet pulled away after a minute "what did they do to you" Garnet said Pearl pointed to her back not trusting herself to speak without crying once again "may i see it?" Garnet asked carefully Pearl went through a battle in her head should she trust this girl after not trusting people for years and only meeting this girl only the other day pearl before she could change her mind turned around and carefully lifted her shirt high enough so garnet could see the burn but not enough to see her ribs and pearl made extra care to not show her stomach where her scars were, there was silence as Garnet stared at the burn she clenched her fists and gritted her teeth "don't worry Pearl I'll sort it out I'll make sure that no one not even the diamond authority will ever lay hands on you again" garnet promised determined to help Pearl and maybe eventually Pearl will smile 'i bet her smile is beautiful' garnet thought smiling dreamily at the thought then it hit her like a ton of bricks 'oh my god I'm falling head over heels with Pearl' Garnet thought a blush spreading across her cheeks. Pearl looked at Garnet once again feeling light headed and strange 'why do i trust you so easily' pearl thought curiously intrigued by her neighbor, "hey since tomorrows a weekend would you like to hang out somewhere tomorrow" garnet asked and pearl nodded a light blush on her cheeks garnet sighed in relief "that's great ill see you tomorrow then" and just like that Garnet was gone pearl sat on her bed and for the first time ever she was excited for tomorrow and pearl fell into a sweet slumber a smile ebbed into her face.


End file.
